Hi, I really don’t feel like posting so I’m just sharing a layout I did of our little getaway to Park City. I’m really happy with it. I found the template from Mrs Wresh and the Retro kit came from one of my new favorite sites, Little Dreamer Designs.

It’s nothing real special. Don’t get to excited.

Here are some layouts I’ve done lately…

Hello everyone. It’s Monday again. We had a lovely weekend though. Jer and I celebrate our wedding anniversary. It’s been a long time since we had a night away from the kiddos. We went to Park City, UT, stayed in a nice little condo, had dinner at a fancy shmancy yummy place and went mountain biking in the morning at Deer Valley Resort. They have these lift assisted rides that make it so much fun. Hello, no up hill, people!! That’s my kind of ride. It was way cool. Perfect weather, fun trails. There were some super challenging trails and we both wiped out a few times. They built these man made obstacles. Some bridges, teeter totters, ladders and logs to ride over. My favorites were the trails that weaved through the trees. So Beautiful!! I did get a couple of tire flats. I have said for years that my bike is cursed. It’s true! and I think Jer finally believes me.

The story goes something like this… I had a boy in college that fell head over feet for me. I kept him around for a while because he was way fun but I knew in my heart that he just wasn’t the right one for me. He was so smitten that he bought a bike for me. Crazy, I know. I can’t believe that I accepted it but I did offer to give it back when I finally cut the cord. He didn’t want it. So ever since it has gotten flats when it has to go over any little bump. The bike hates me and it is always a reminder that I hurt someone. Sigh… I’d like to get rid of the thing but my hubby keeps it around and rides it to work for some crazy reason. It even gives him troubles too but a free ride is better then no ride, I guess.

Anyhoo, I took pictures of our trip (I should get some photos of our war wounds; especially Jer’s knees. Yikes! Ouchy!) but Emma carried off my camera and left it in a fabric store this morning. Don’t ask me why I was letting her play with it. I guess I have to go back and get it but hopefully nobody will carry it off. It sure isn’t worth much.

I have totally lost my blogging mojo. Couldn’t you tell? I don’t think I’m the only one though after reading through my reader, there just wasn’t that many posts to read. I guess you’re either busy getting kids ready for school or finishing the days with a final summer hurray.

This last weekend I had my ten year high school reunion. I not sure what to say about it… But I was actually looking forward to it. I mean, I think most people dread it but I was excited to see people that had always been so nice to me. I never have that much to say to others but I seem to find comfort in the fact that I can just look at their faces, see how they are doing and then, I guess, walk away and continue on with our own little separate lives. A few people I really wanted to see didn’t show. Who knows what their doing… something important, I guess.

I did loved hanging out and laughing with the old crowd of buddies. I wish we could do that more often. It’s nice that we only seem to remember the good times… pool hopping, pillow tag, tightie whitie runs and a few practical jokes. We sat around and laughed our heads off and rolling our eyes. Lets just pretend the hurtful moments never happened.
Anyhoo, I feel kinda silly. I’m not living in the past but I do feel that if I had another chance of going at things again- I do alot better. Ya know, take the knowledge that we’ve gained and go back and do things right. Wouldn’t that be nice? That will never happen though and at least we learned a few things.

One really funny thing happened. Of course, such an event cannot go with out a mishap or embarrassing moment….

I have a dear cousin who decided to come to my high school at the last minute. I was really nervous at first. I wasn’t sure that I wanted someone to know what I was like at school. (I was quiet around home and family but not so much at school, if you know what I mean.) I introduced her to my great group of friends and they accepted her immediately. It was fabulous. It turned out perfect and my cousin and I became closer then ever. Her nickname became “Cousin” and everyone loved her.

Well… we had a family picnic at the reunion. I showed up and saw Cousin from across the way…

We had on the exact same shirt from American Eagle. We also both had on brown cropped pants and brown flip flops. We laughed so hard, we cried. We looked like twins. We spent the rest of the afternoon standing apart from each other. The best part of it all was that I had laid out an outfit for Jer to wear. Luckily he didn’t what to wear that particular shirt or else our husbands would have matched too. Yup, Cousins husband was wearing the same shirt I’d laid out for Jer. I guess we’re more alike then I’d thought.

So overall, I had a great time. I’ve got a week or so left of the summer and then I have to get my life ready for a preschooler. I’m charting new territory. I’m going to actually have a little bit more schedualed life. Should be good for me.

Emma: Where’s mommy?

Dad: I don’t know have you seen her?

Emma: Maybe she’s in her room. I saw her running down the hall with a black book tucked under her arm? She looked suspicious. What’s she doing?

Dad: I don’t know, lets go find out.

Dad and Emma crawl to the bed room on a mini safari in search of the lost mommy.  They slowly push the door open. They enter into the messy master bedroom. Dad holds his breathe and Emma has her fingers in her mouth. The anticipations increases. The lights are dim and the bed side lamp is lit. There is a large, still lump in the middle of the bed. They slowly creep in and peek around the large mass of blankets and pillows.

There she sits with the black book in hand.

Emma: Mommy?

There is no response. Mommy’s eyes are wide and her breathing heavy.

Dad: Mand?

Still no response.

Dad: Come on, Em. Lets go. Mommy is reading her crazy book about vampires. It’s a mystery to me but I don’t think we’ll see her until tomorrow.

It feel like summer time is starting to come to an end even with a good part of the month left. I’ve been busy trying to live it up with the kids. Swimming, bike riding and playing outdoors in the hose. So sad… why does summer also go so fast? Emma is going to go to preschool in September and I think it’s going to be a new stage of life for us. What can I say, my little girl is growing up.

I’ve been doing a little scrapbooking so I thought I’d show off a simple but darling page of Emma and two of her cousins.

Ta ta for now.

Being Emma’s 4th birthday today, I am feeling somewhat nostalgic about the day she arrived into our little family. My mind flashes back to that little pink thing they laid in my arms and then declared that I was a mother. My life changed dramatically from that moment on.

*** *** *** *** *** *** ***

When I was pregnant with Emma, I had decided to jump on the natural childbirth band wagon. Thinking that I was tough and all natural, it was right up my alley. My sister had supplied me with books and magazines to read and I was getting pretty excited about it. I didn’t bother taking any child birth classes but I got a Bradly book from the library and tried to get Jer to read it. I had made the decision to go naturally because I felt that if I did actually make the decision instead of a “wait and see” attitude I might not make it.

So time went on and I had a very healthy pregnancy. I was very active. Jer and I were still rock climbing until I could fit in my harness anymore. I was walking my dog regularly and felt at time got closer that I would be ready and it would be sooner then later.

Being, obviously, inexperienced, we had picked just some random OBGYN near our house. The office had a midwife so I felt comfortable with that even though it wasn’t guaranteed that she’d the the one attending the birth.

Our friends had just started up a 3D baby sonogram place. They let us go for free at 30 weeks and see the squishy round baby face of our soon to come little girl. The sonographer informed us that the baby was breech and that they often turn around so not to worry.

At my next appointment with my midwife, I asked her what position the baby was in. She said it was head down and I asked her to double check. Yup, she was still breech. I started to panic but she said there was still time and told me to do all those upside down exercises.

I did. They made me sick. But I still did them… every night. I’d kneel in bed with my bum up in the air, my head down on the bed and quite often jer shinning lights, playing music and talking, yes, to my bum. I’d pray super hard too. She didn’t turn.

We tried external inversion or whatever it is called and that didn’t work. Her heart rate dropped so they stopped trying. I was so sad. My hopes of a natural birth were fleeing away.

The time got closer and my midwife wanted to schedule a C section around 38 weeks. We reluctantly did but we wanted to get the baby at much time as possible to turn around on her own. She suggested that one of the doctors perform the surgery. He was the best and would stitch me up real nice. We tried to talk to the doctor about pushing the date back but he was upset at us for being so foolish. He said he’d been in enough emergency C sections when S*** had hit the fan and he wasn’t going to do it again when he didn’t have to. Yes, very professional, I know.

So we were at a loss of what to do. We called around trying to find someone who would work with us. Everyone said no. We found one Amish midwife in Pennsylvania that would deliver a breech baby but that was a 3 hour drive from our house in MD.

So after a lot of prayer, we (or should I say Jeremy (because at this point I was in a state of totally disarray) decided that the best thing to do was to go ahead and have the C section. Up to the very morning I was still hoping and praying that she’d turn on her own.

She didn’t. We went to the hospital that morning and prepped for surgery. I, at least, decided to forget about being disappointed and was anxious enough just to become a mother.

I had an epidural. It made me sick and I vomited all over the nurses hand. For some reason it was also difficult to breathe but at least I was numb. I asked the anesthesiologist’s if it was normal and he said it was just my reaction to the epidural. It didn’t help though when the Dr was pushing on my stomach so hard to get the baby out. Apparently, Emma’s head was a little bit stuck. I could see the beads of sweat dripping down the dr’s face. He got a little bit nervous and told the midwife in a harsh voice to put her hands “here!” I watched with a little mirror and Jer tried to record the birth with the video tape until she got to nauseated to watch.

Aug 6th at 8:19 am she was born. She came out feet first. Crying. They sewed me up.

Her blood sugar was a little low so they rushed her off the nursery. I held her for about 30 seconds as the wheeled me down the hall to recovery.

I didn’t get her back for a few hours. By then, she wasn’t hungry because they’d given her sugar water. Thus, I had a hard time getting her to eat but we eventually got it.

She had dark long hair and dark eyes. 8lbs even. We didn’t name her for a few days. Obvisously, I can’t make decisions, especially when they are big ones. Jeremy named her Emma and I said okay but her middle name will be Jane.

She turned out to be pretty fussy baby. We almost went insane. She’d cry inconsolably for hours. We’d walk the dark streets at night and take long warm baths. Up until 6 months did things start to improve. I always felt a little resentful, like they had taken her before she was ready to come out and that is why she was so fussy.

She’s a fun bubbly little girl now. She has a flare for performing and being dramatic. We sure love her.

Happy Birthday Emma!

Okay, I’ve decided to calm down and take Isaac’s screaming and fits in stride with the rest of life. I’m just going to focus on not ignoring him so much. I think the screaming is just his way of trying to communicate with me and the hitting tantrums are his frustration coming out when he does not get his way. No big deal… I can handle this. I just may not want to go into public for a few years. (he he)

Today is Emma’s birthday. She literally has been counting down for months. I don’t know what has driven her to want to be four but alas my 3 year old sweetie is gone. She woke up bright eyed and giggly when she saw the purple and pink balloons just for her. Sigh… such simple pleasures. She can hardly wait for her party to come.

(I really should be cleaning the house in anticipation of my guests but why should I when the computer is sitting and humming at me so softly… “Come and relax in the cool dark basement… Stare at my bright screen for hours on end… I know you want too…)

The truth is I just finished my latest book. (okay, that makes me sound like I read… I don’t… hardly ever…) My neighborhood ladies were panting and squealing over this book called Twilight. They said it was a must read. A totally romantic, I can’t but the book down, love story. They handed me a copy without me even saying yea or nae. So now that I’ve read it… I agree. I don’t think I hyperventilated over the romance or anything (ummm… maybe once or twice) but it was a way fun read. I’d recommend it.

I accidentally let Isaac take a cat nap in the car today so it’s going to be a long afternoon for me.

Speaking of the little man, he is starting to do something new… it is so annoying. He is throwing these little tantrum fits. He’ll crinkle up his face and scream really loud and mean sounding… like he hates me and is so mad at me. He’ll fling his arms around and hit anything with in sight, multiple times, occasionally banging his head around. I know the little man is frustrated but he just can’t climb up on the counter, play with anything he wants, eat small objects or whatever else he wants to do.

Come on now, buddy. Lets learn some limits.

I’m pretty terrified about it because I know he’s going to spazz out on me one day somewhere really public. I want to nip it in the bud right now before he gets in the habit of it but I’m not sure how to deal with it. He’s 15 mos…. any ideas??

Time outs? Speaking gently? Uh Oh… how sad? Ignore it?