I have been working on a big scrapbooking project for a friend of mine. I took it on thinking I was going to teach her how to digi scrap but instead she has basically turned the whole thing over to me.

My friends daughter was born with a severe cleft palate.  The scrapbook we are making is going to be about their journey and experience with the cleft palate. They have been through so many surgeries that they can’t seem to keep track of them any more. The daughter is now turning 18 and has just about completed her journey. Needless to say, I have learned a ton about cleft palates and all that it can entail, both physically and emotionally. I’ve really been touched hearing my friend explain in detail the emotions that they experienced. The journaling in this scrapbook is really going to make this book so special.

I certainly enjoy helping her make it but it sure is taking up a bit of my time. I look forward to it being done. I’m hoping to crank away on it and get it done before the busy holiday season kicks into full gear.

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We’ve been battling minor colds and such at our house.  Leah has been tugging at her ears so I may be running to the pediatrician tomorrow. Sigh. Even being sick she really isn’t too fussy of a kid so it’s hard to believe that she may be miserable.

I feel like I must leave you with a picture to boost up this sleepy post. Issac had the nastiest road rash the other day. It made his eye swell up and everything. He told me that he crashed into the curb on his bike. That boy has super duper biking skills so I suspect that he wasn’t watching where he was going. I’ve caught him doing that a lot, even when he is just walking. Goodness, Boy!

Oh, don’t mind the lunch still hanging out on his face. Here is another angle just in case you weren’t grossed out enough.

We thought he might he left with a black eye but it is clearing up quite well although he has picked off most of the scab. Hopefully it wont leave to bad of a scar.

Ta da. Now I can leave you in peace.

Yesterday I had one of those really depressing days as a mother when you ask yourself if what you are doing… or not doing… is good enough.

Am I doing enough that my children will grow up properly? How can I keep the house clean, spend enough time with my son and set aside time for my hobbies? How can I teach my children to behave? to talk properly? to be nice to everyone and make good friends? Is what I’m doing enough?

How can I possibly do everything I should be doing when half of it is stuff I really don’t want to do? Am I being to selfish? Is what I’m doing good enough to make it into the pearly gates?

Being a mother is hard. It’s a super challenge. Most days are full of mundane tasks but in the long run all these little things are going to add up to be powerful enough to… do what… move mountains? I’m not sure but it must be something great. I know it’s important but sometimes I don’t feel up to the job.

Lately I’ve been thinking about opening up my own shop. A place to sell scrapbooking templates and maybe even some home sewn goods. It’s going to be a lot of work to get it up and running and I’m not sure I’m up for the job. In fact I’m totally overwhelmed by the idea. I already have a full time job. I’m torn. If I don’t try I’ll never know if I’ll be successful or not.

On the other hand… my little people need me.

In the midst of all this inner turmoil, my girlfriend posted about this youtube on her blog.  It’s about creating. It hit home for me because I really want to create beautiful things.

“The desire to create is one of the deepest yearning of the human soul.”

I want to be a part of something great. I want to have a talent that is worth something. I found my self bawling into the sweet little fuzzy head of Leah. I found myself thinking about how the best creation that I have made is my children. So how can I balance my time between raising beautiful children and fulfilling my own dreams?

I was looking around amongst the other youtubes and found this one. It has a beautiful message as well and I think it answers my question. I’m not saying that I wont do my shop but I might just need to fix my priorities a bit. If I can better organize my time so that my boy doesn’t watch hours of TV while I’m on the computer than, yes, I’ll go for it. But not until I can get things set right.

“Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.”

We had a great Halloween. I just love a reason to have a party. There is nothing quite like a gathering with with people you love and eating lots of yummy food.

I can’t get enough of this costume of Leah’s. I snagged it off the clearance rack the day before Halloween and am so happy with it. I just wish I had more reasons to put her in it. Maybe I’ll just stick her in it for trips to the grocery store and tell inquiring strangers she insisted on wearing it.

Emma wanted to be Red Riding Hood because she loves the Usborne version of the tale in her Illustrated Fairy Tales book. I tried super hard to convince her to be Word Girl or Wonder Women because Isaac wanted to be Spiderman and I wanted a theme but it was to no avail. Here they are practicing their “trick or treat.”

Now that Halloween is over, we are performing an experiment to see how much candy a child can eat until they truly become sick to their stomach. So far there have been no changes in the kids health. There has, however, been an increased amount of “flips” performed on the couch cushions by Isaac.

Is a sugar high a real thing?